1̶4̶ Lots of Christmas Songs That Won’t Make You Scream

2021: It’s back! More than new additions from the likes of Beck, Amy Winehouse, No Doubt, The Eels, Smashing Pumpkins, Fall Out Boy and Kurtis Blow..

Remember: Even if you’re stuck, Christmas music doesn’t have to suck

Get the list here.

2018: Updated with The Shins, Kacey Musgraves, Julian Casablancas, The Eels and the much loved and lost Frightened Rabbit.

Updated: New stuff from Hurts, Glasvegas, The Fall, Bad Religion, The Walkmen and a version of Metallica’s Whom The Bell Tolls which The Grinch would be proud of..

Christmas, eh. Your boss has just told you how to can get a raise from them really quickly. A co-worker has been whistling “Walking In The Air” tunelessly to themselves since Bonfire Night. Any festive spirit evaporated the moment your Secret Santa present was revealed to be a Lynx Africa gift set and if you hear Shakin’ Stevens one more time you’ll be forced to tell everyone it was you who spiked the punch with laxatives.

Help is at hand though: a gift from me to you that with the aid of a pair of headphones will let you zone out totally from mistletoe waving gargoyles and christmas jumpered douchebags. The playlist below should get you through, at least until hometime or you hit the closest bar.

No cheese here; the NME’s takedown of Smith & Burrows Funny Looking Angels was bitchily perfect, but their cover of the Longpigs On And On has all the majesty of the original, whilst both Low and Surfjan Stevens play it straight, The Killers predictably do the opposite and The Ravonettes’ garage punk is wickedly naughty rather than nice.

If it’s festive film tie-in’s you like Run DMC’s Christmas In Hollis features in that seasonal classic Die Hard, whilst who can’t imagine Lemmy as Santa himself, coming down the chimney and then necking all your sherry. Speaking of coming at this time of year, Sia obviously still believes, no playlist should ever not have The Ramones on it and you’ll discover New Found Glory have a slow song as well as a fast one.

What could be more appropriate at this most uplifting time of year finally than Eazy-E closing out the party with a heartfelt Merry Muthafuckin’ Christmas, one you might want to put on once granny is happily asleep in her chair and doing stuff you have to blame on the dog.

Nothing big for me this year.

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